I’m going to get fired! – Thomas

Thomas (4) was helping to wrap presents this morning.  He took the initiative to wrap up a couple of DVDs for us. The first one was kind of a mess, because rather than take a single large piece of paper, Thomas cut out several smaller pieces and taped them all onto the DVD.  It looked okay at the end however, because he made sure to tape up all the seams with about half a role of scotch tape.

When he was done, mommy said, “Wow! Thomas you could almost become one of Santa’s elves!”  Thomas replied…

I don’t want to be an elf, because I’m going to get fired.

Uh, “fired”?  How does he even know about getting fired???  So, we asked him why he thinks he’ll get fired.

Because I’m going to get fired if I don’t make toys.

Hot Hot Santa (ooh, my eyes… my eyes…)

Quick! Stop Global Warming!!

If you thought those lights were cool…

If you thought these other lights were cool… check this one out.  Personally, I like this one a LOT better!!

Wanna learn about Copyrights and Fair Use?

Check out this video… I found it to be quite funny and impressive the amount of effort it took to create it.

You can be rude, and still be nice.

At JFK, I’m going thru the airport security.  I do this on a frequent basis, so I’m very familiar with the procedures and rules, etc.  There was a single mom in front of me holding an infant, and trying to go thru the metal detector.

The TSA agent (one-bar only, duh) kept repeating… “hold your ticket in your hand, shoes on the belt,” etc.  She was doing it with that arrogant tone of “I’m better than you, and your stupid”  but she kept saying polite words.  What I mean is that if you wrote down all the words she said, she was being polite, but her tone was clearly very arrogant and she must have been on some kind of power trip.

So this mom was holding the baby on her hip, she gave the TSA agent her boarding pass, which by now has been wadded up in her hand… remember, infant in arms.  The TSA agent tells her, “Maam, I need to see your pass”

She extends her hand, and the agent repeats her demand.

All I heard next was, “Well, how am I supposed to know it’s folded up in your hand?”  (guess who said that).

So, she unfolds it and is just about to let the woman thru, when she sees the baby has on infant “shoes”.  If you have kids, you know what I’m talking about.  These are hardly shoes.  They’re basically leather socks.  They have no sole to speak of and they’re to keep a kids feet warm and look like shoes.

Anyways, the TSA agent demands the woman take off the baby’s shoes.  Holding up the line, and everything.

Look, I know she’s got a job to do, and I appreciate stopping the terrorists, but I’m 100% sure that a baby’s “shoes” are not holding explosives and would not be a threat to anyone.

Where is profiling when you need it?!?!?

BTW, as I finally got to go through, I had my left hand in my pants pocket, and my right was holding my unfolded boarding pass.  She wouldn’t let me go through with my hand in the pocket.  In fact, she made me take my hand out of my pocket and go back through the metal detector.

They’ve never done that before, and that’s asinine!  It’s a metal detector, and my hand is not going to prevent metal detection!

When I questioned it, she said “Well, I don’t know what’s in your pocket.  Could be something good or something bad!”  Uh, right.  Someone is a little drunkie on power, I think…

Cab in the rain in NYC is EASY!! …Not

Was in New York today… (still at JFK as I write this actually but heading home soon), and it was a lovely rainy day.  Sometimes the rain would slow to a drizzle, and then it would pick up again, and then it would drizzle, and then it would pour, and then… — eh you get the idea.

Well, the plan was that I was going to attend two Christmas parties that two of my partners (for work) were throwing (same night, same times).  I got a cab over to the first… stayed for about 45 minutes, then had to leave.  It was being held at a bar called “Stout”.  BUSY place on a rainy Thursday, but the appetizers they were passing around were pretty good.  Saw my buddies — some who had gotten a good head start on the tap — and had to leave to go to the next party.

So, I started walking in the right direction…  looking for opportunities to grab a cab.  They were all full.  I kept walking, hoping one would eventually be empty.  No luck.  8 or 10 blocks later, I get to the address of the party…  133 East 40th Street.  Hmm… there’s no bar here like there should be.  I looked at my invite note again.  The address was right, but then I noticed it said “between 6th Ave and Broadway”.  So off I began to walk again… back-tracking, up-hill, in the rain.  It was raining pretty hard btw.

I finally get there, with about 5 minutes before the time I had to leave to catch a ride to the airport.  Soaked.  Cold.  Tired.

Turns out the address was actually 133 West 40th Street, and no one told me about the error.    One of my colleagues had forwarded the email to me, and when a correction email went out, she forgot to let me know.

Sigh.

Screw the cabs. I called a car service to take me to the airport.

If the Matrix ran Windows XP…

The title says it all…

and here’s another one…